Jess asked:
Should I see my father?
It’s difficult when we look at adults or people who are considered to be elders to us, who are supposed to be more knowledgeable, more sensitive, more aware and more understanding. It’s difficult to look at them and know that and see through them and realize that they don’t match our expectations.
You need to be very aware that every being has their own lesson, their own journey and they grow at their own speed and in their own time and we always have to honor that no matter if that’s our mother, father child, brother, sister, or pet. We have to honor every thing that soul decides to go through.
You will come across many times in your life where you will see beings that don’t have the same intellect, viewpoint, compassion and understanding as you do so learn this now; learn not to condemn them for not being in the same place you are. Instead hold compassion for them and ask yourself “how can I help them get beyond where they are?”. You’re very lucky that you ARE beyond where they are. You’ve already learned so it’s not their fault that they haven’t. It’s just like you would not want anyone to condemn you for not being educated in something.
It’s very important that you step back. I would suggest that you take at least 2 weeks to evaluate and gather your thoughts, looking at him in a new light. Instead of looking at him for what you wish him to be, look at him for where he is as a soul and honor his journey. Don’t focus on the disappointment you hold for what he hasn’t done for you, he’s simply incapable of that and when you recognize that he is incapable, you hopefully will understand that your expectations are unrealistic of him and this is just a fact.
Recognize that it’s not about anything you’ve done wrong, it’s only about where his soul chooses to be and what he’s chosen to learn. At the same time, you don’t want to hurt yourself by being exposed to this energy when it doesn’t feed you in a positive light. For this reason, I would suggest that you have a distant relationship with him after you come to terms with understanding where he’s at and that it’s not your fault. Have a distant relationship with him whether it be through electronic connections such as cell phone or email instead of a personal relationship with him.
Work to build yourself to a space where you feel comfortable because there is an onus put on you to be responsible for your adult father that is not fair and not realistic for you at your age. Sometimes others around you place expectations on you and you feel responsible and that’s your personality. This is the lesson for you to begin to understand that when others place expectations on you, you have a choice to accept them, feeling accountable and responsible, or not. And in this case I’d suggest you don’t.
Learn to love yourself and learn to accept what’s important to you. I’m not saying you should harm others by your choices, but if what you need is not to see him, then you can tell him or word it in a way that’s not harmful. There is a lot of anger, frustration, aggression and disappointment in you that needs to be cleared in another way so I would also suggest that you go see someone outside of your family that you can talk to to help you release those energies. You don’t need that emotion in you. It’s just harming you.
And I want to tell you that I love you very much and I see your beautiful heart and I see your beautiful light. Just because others don’t see that within you, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist so always remember that please. When I kiss you all over and get excited about you, it’s because I feel your love and I’m so excited to exchange love with you because your heart is very innocent. I really worry because I don’t want anybody to interfere with that innocence of your heart. You need that going forward.
When you grow older, you’re going to help people who are not well and you will work in the medical field but not in the same way as your mother. You will definitely help others so you don’t want to lose the innocence of your heart because it’s the innocence of your heart that feeds the love to others which is what your passion and purpose is on this Earth. You will help others feel good about themselves and you’ll help them learn how to accept themselves no matter where they are in their journey, in their life, and no matter what anybody else thinks.
So use that concept with your father and understand that he needs to learn to accept himself – and he doesn’t – so his actions and words are more self-reflective than they are pointed at you. It’s hard to watch somebody harm themselves but sometimes you just have to accept it and feed them love anyways.
Don’t forget to do arts and crafts because that’s important for you too.
Thanks,
Isa