Sometimes when we play tennis, the objective is to have fun so we volley the ball back and forth. If we jointly decide that we’re going to play for fun, we want the ball to rally back and forth. We don’t want the ball to stray. Consequently, we focus on trying to hit the ball in such a manner that ensures a successful return of the ball so we’re courteous of the other person. The tennis partner gets to hit the ball and we make sure not to hit it out of bounds. We want to have fun with our partner, enjoy our time to together.
But when we want to compete with someone, the scenario changes. That person is no longer our partner, but our opponent. We’re not so nice. We play mean. We play different and difficult. We try to strategize, making our opponent miss the ball and deliberately hit it in a way that it can’t easily be returned.
Life is like a game of tennis. This is how we interact with people in life depending on whether we like the person or not. If we like the person and want to have fun with them, then we play the fun game. Alternately, if we don’t like the person, if we feel threatened by the person or if our ego takes over and wants to win, then we act in a way that is more destructive to the relationship.
In tennis when you keep score, love means nothing… Literally. You both start the match with love for one another but when something such as winning is at stake, love is cast aside like yesterday’s ripped up dog toy.
When we play tennis for fun, we laugh and it’s easy. It doesn’t matter if we make mistakes because we support one another. We feel good afterwards. However, when we compete because of ego, we use up all of our energy, getting hot, sweaty and tired afterwards because we’ve exerted so much of ourselves.
So how do you play your life? Do you play the tennis score of “love-all” or do you play “game, set, and match”?